Alpha mindset – 7 attractive traits to master

by Veikko Arvonen // June 30 // 0 Comments
Alpha Mindset

When it comes to climbing up in social hierarchies, your mindset is one of the most important assets you can have. Therefore mastering your alpha mindset is crucial if you’re willing to go from zero to hero.

If you’ve read my ultimate guide about alpha males, you already know that social hierarchies still exist in the modern world. The good news is that today it’s easier than ever to climb up.

There are many ways you can start doing that, but the most important thing is to master a proper mindset. See, your mindset is your greatest asset. It determines how you act and how you respond to external factors. Above all, the way you see yourself, the other people, and the world around you will eventually become your reality.

OK, enough of the theory, I’m sure you’re willing to hear what alpha mindset is and how to get it. In this article, you’ll learn seven important traits of the alpha mindset, and how to start shaping your mentality in the right direction.

What is the alpha mindset?

Alpha mindset is a mindset of the people who are on top of the social hierarchies (a.k.a alpha males or females). This mindset contains lots of different characteristics that will help you to get forward in life, make other people respect you, and provide you a pleasant lifestyle.

Some important traits of this mindset are confidence, positivity, and a passion for constant improvement. As you can see, having this mindset will level up your life and provide you several benefits such as success in your career and social life.

Sounds good? Keep reading!

Alpha male characteristics

Let’s start with the characteristics of a proper alpha mindset. These traits are something that you can start practicing instantly and see how your life changes. Mastering them will take some time and it depends on your current situation, but in the end, it will be worth it.

1. Be deeply secure with your flaws

The truth is that everybody has flaws. We can’t change that. However, we can decide how we deal with them. Alphas are known for being extremely secure with their flaws because they know that they don’t make them worse people.

It’s important to realize that everybody has something they’re ashamed of and something they dislike about themselves. You have to understand that this is OK. Nobody’s perfect.

Once you accept that you have weaknesses, your life becomes much easier. You’ll achieve higher self-esteem and you can be authentic. If something about your flaws comes up in a conversation, just remember that everyone has them. Nobody just likes to keep a noise about them.

Above all, rather than focusing on your flaws, people focus more on how you see them. If you can admit your mistakes like a man and maintain high self-esteem, that’s a sign of confidence.

Think about something you don’t like about yourself. Chances are you’re not alone and your problem is more common than you realize.

2. Humble but proud

There are situations in life where the best thing to do is to stay humble and admit your mistakes. Then there are situations where you have put yourself first and be a little egoistic.

A person with an alpha mindset has the guts to be humble when admitting mistakes or being a beginner at something. Sometimes you have to apologize or learn from your mistakes when learning something new. However, you’ll also have to remember that this doesn’t make you a worse person. Whatever happens, you’ll have to be proud enough to carry out yourself with dignity and maintain your self-esteem.

For example, when learning a new skill, be humble enough to respect people who are teaching you using their mastery, but proud enough to realize that it’s OK to suck at something first.

Another example is when you have to apologize or admit a mistake. Be humble enough to admit it and take responsibility, but proud enough to stand up for yourself if someone blames you too much.

This is confidence at its finest. Knowing that you’ll make mistakes and suck at something, but never letting it lower your self-esteem. When you do this, people will respect you. They’ll see that you have the guts to stay humble when needed, but you still see yourself as a valuable person.

3 No need to compare

Have you seen those guys who always brag about their achievements and want to compare their results? Better yet, are they doing it with things they’re better at?

Those people are something you definitely want to stay away from. And something you should never be like. When a person with the alpha mindset joins a group, he doesn’t think he’s better or worse than anyone. He knows he doesn’t have to compare himself to impress others or feel good about himself.

If you compare yourself to someone in front of other people and win, one of the two things happens. People with low self-esteem and social intelligence may consider you superior and feel bad about themselves, but truly confident people think it’s pathetic.

I mean, people who do this aren’t confident enough to feel good without external validation. And if they exploit people who are weaker than them, it’s even more pathetic. There’s always someone who could do the same for you.

NEVER, do that. Remember that the only person you should compare yourself to is who you were yesterday. I don’t care if you’re hanging with the shyest guy you know or the president of the U.S. Don’t compare!

4 Never try to impress others

This one is great to add after the previous point. Just like you should never try to impress yourself by comparing, you should never try to impress others.

Doing that signals that you’re insecure and need other people’s approval to feel good about yourself. Needless to say, this isn’t a part of the alpha mindset. Again, this may work on some people, but socially skilled people will see right through your show.

Of course, there will be situations where you can display your strengths smoothly without seeming arrogant, and you should do that. Just remember that there’s a difference between making your capabilities apparent smoothly and bragging like an insecure kid.

Demonstrating a high value is a good idea, but never try to desperately impress others.

In the worst-case scenario, some people will realize that you need their approval and start to use you. You don’t want that to happen…

5 Growth mindset

What the hell is a growth mindset? It’s a mindset that may deserve an entire article, but I’ll give you a quick guide.

A growth mindset basically means that you’re always willing to improve and expand your limits. Rather than seeing your capabilities as your limits, you’re willing to improve them, knowing that whatever you do, you’ll suck at it first.

A major part of the growth mindset is how you treat failure. Too many people believe something is embarrassing in failure without realizing that it’s a crucial part of success.

In a nutshell, the growth mindset means seeing the world full of opportunities and improving yourself constantly, because you know that you can achieve pretty much anything if you put in the effort.

That’s how people with an alpha mindset pursue their goals, and that’s why they’re successful.

6 Failure is better than regret

Let’s talk more about failure. As you learned in the previous chapter, you’ll have to face the risk of failure if you want to succeed. And who wouldn’t want to…

When you’re learning a new skill or developing something, you’re going to suck at it first. Therefore you are going to fail before you succeed, and those failures will teach you more than any book or advice ever will.

If you consider failure a bad thing, you’re seriously hurting your chances to succeed in anything. You have to understand that there’s nothing wrong with failure. Anyone who claims otherwise is someone who you shouldn’t listen to. Unless you want to live in a box of mediocrity for the rest of your life.

What is not OK, is constantly letting your fear of failure stop you and never achieving anything in life. Ask yourself, would you rather fail a couple of times, or regret the opportunities you never took? Learn to get over the fear of failure, and see how your life changes.

7 Everything will be fine

One of the most important factors of the alpha mindset is knowing that everything will be fine. One way or another.

When you put yourself out there and start improving yourself, it will be messy. You’ll make mistakes, screw up things, and face different setbacks.

This goes with everything. You may lose some money when starting a business, or accidentally offend a girl you approach. If you’ve properly developed an alpha mindset, realizing this part should be fairly easy.

You have to realize that learning new things is a mess, sometimes a big one. This is OK. Just keep learning from mistakes and taking action to deal with things, and you’ll be just fine in the end.

This kind of positivity is both good for you and attractive for other people. I mean, who likes negative energy? Even pretty fucked up situations can be dealt with using proper action and time.

How to get the alpha mindset

alpha mindset vs beta mindset

Obviously, if you’re not having the alpha mindset, you want to know how to get it. To be honest, there’s not a simple answer. Your mindset is something that doesn’t change overnight, and you’ll have to improve it once in a while.

On the other hand, improving your mindset can be the best thing you’ll ever do. Spending a while to improve it in your teens or twenties can skyrocket the rest of your life.

A good way to start is to ask yourself how many of the seven traits you can relate to. And I mean really relate. Are you truly secure with your flaws? Do you really feel like you don’t need to impress anyone?

Practicing those things will help you. When something about your weaknesses comes up, admit it with dignity and see how people respond. Or next time when entering a social situation, remember that you don’t need to compare.

It’s also possible that this article gave you some epiphanies and your mindset is already changing. This is what happened to me back in time. I realized that the world sees you just like you see yourself, so I started to bring myself up with dignity and without being ashamed of my flaws. And people noticed that.

If you want to enjoy the benefits of having the alpha mindset, you have to transform your mentality. Knowing these things isn’t enough. You’ll have to actually BELIEVE them and let that reflect from your words, body language, and actions.

Transforming who you are

Changing your mindset may require more or less effort, but it’s the first step of becoming an alpha male. Everybody’s different, so mastering your alpha mindset is your unique process.

You may have had some epiphanies as I did. When you realize these things about human behavior, your mindset may have already shifted.

If this didn’t happen, it’s OK. Consider practicing these traits in real life. When you get a positive response when admitting flaws or dealing with failure, it will affect your mindset.

It may also be a great idea to read this post again, take notes, meditate… Do anything that you need to let these facts sink in. As I said before, everyone’s mindset is different, and therefore you’ll have to develop it yourself.

Above all, realize that once you master your mindset, it becomes your reality. Even if people disagree with you, your rock-hard beliefs will keep you on track and affect their opinions.

Everything starts from your mindset. Things don’t get awkward if you don’t make them. Failure won’t stop you if you don’t let it. In the end, it’s all up to you.


I hope the previous chapter gave you some inspiration to start shifting your mindset. As I said before, it may not happen overnight, but it can become the best thing you’ve ever done.

If you want to improve yourself, I highly recommend starting from your mindset. I’ve done my best to give you tips, but from this point, it’s up to you.

So, feel free to ask any questions if you need to. There’s an exciting journey in front of you. Good luck!

Veikko Arvonen is a blogger with a burning passion for self-development. In his blog, he shares battle-tested tips to become more confident, charismatic, attractive, and happier. Back in time, he got tired of being at the lower end of the pecking order and decided to change. Now, you can learn his lessons from this blog.